Monday, June 15, 2009

Life's Journey HOME

This past weekend was very challenging. The gestation at which Layah was born, 23.3 was on Saturday, so getting past that day was another weight off my shoulders. Now we have to get past 26.5 -when Tobi came- which will be the first week of July. My mom and I went to my first baby shower since Layah passed away, and it was for a baby girl. It was for my dear friend, Rachel, who lost her son, Isaac, the December before Layah. She's the one whose husband, Thomas, and my mother-in-law met at the cemetery, (our children are buried about 20 feet apart). Rachel is due to have, Annabella Karen, July 13. Going to the shower, I was anxious, nervous, excited, filled with many emotions. My biggest fear was that someone would ask, "how do you and Rachel know each other". I couldn't say, "we met through the cemetery where our babies are buried". Thank my sweet, Heavenly Father, no one asked. It was funny, I actually won the only shower game we did, "baby lotto". There were about 20 folks there, so me and one other lady got a Starbucks gift card! How ironic? So, Rachel is 34 weeks, one month shy of the 38 weeks she was when she gave birth to Isaac, who went to heaven after only 18 minutes of his precious life. During the shower, as I looked at her beautiful pregnant belly, I thought,she was probably even bigger, physically, when she had Isaac. She had to endure from 16-38 weeks, knowing they'd probably not be bringing him home. They couldn't decorate the nursery, have a shower, or just enjoy getting bigger and bigger each week, with life in her. It thrilled me to see her so happy, as she opened her gifts, and glowed with the excitement of a mother anticipating the arrival of her daughter, very soon. We stayed for the whole thing, and as we left, she hugged me and whispered, "I know what a big deal this was for you to come". I couldn't say it back, but I wanted to say the same for her. This was the joy and celebration she never got to experience with Isaac in her belly. I am so looking forward to having a shower-this time, before my son gets here!

The title of the devotional I read today was Eternal Spring . The author reflected on youth and growing older, physicall and spiritually. He reminded us that in our youth, we have physical strength and beauty. We are happily occupied with our routines & relationships. We may not long for our true, eternal home until we realize our old age. But as time passes on, as we lose our physical strength and beauty and lose loved ones to sickness and old age, the things that once we lived for, are still important of course, but the longing and urning for our heavenly home becomes closer to our heart's desires. We must live each day, grateful for the blessing God has given us, but also live knowing that this is our temporary home. We are aliens to this world and will one day go home. It reminded me of that song, by Jason Ingram, I previously entered on my post. The song was how her (the little girl is was written for) life, although too short to us impacted us and others. The chorus is

"That your days here changed everything. You're missed here and will always be. But you left here, the greatest gift of all, Cause our hearts ache for home."

Another thing I read reminded me that even in these troubling economic times, when the things that once seemed certain are no longer, those of us that are still blessed to be employed should remember how grateful to be.
Colossians 3:15, 22 "...Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. AND BE THANKFUL. .....And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him....22 Slaves, obey your earthly masters in everything; and do it, not only when their eye is on you and to win their favor, but with sincerity of heart and reverence for the Lord. Whatever, you do work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, NOT FOR MEN, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving...."
We have to be productive, efficient, accurate, going above and beyond, early rather than late, etc..... all the characteristics of an employee that a company benefits tremendously in having. BUT, this verse reminds us that besides doing all our duties and obligations we are required to meet expectations, we are to do EVERYTHING-speaking of work right now- as a servant to the Lord, knowing He can see, even when our boss or co workers may not.

Lord, remind me of the constant goal- your words, "Well done my good and faithful servant". Continue to equip me in this life for all that I will face. Remind me, with your presence, that I will not face it alone. Forgive me when I disappoint you, and help me to use those mistakes to grow closer to You Help me glorify Your Name in every word and deed. Help me to shine your light in all I do, and every area of my life, home, and work. Thank you for being our anchor through everything, big and small. Thank you for Your Son becoming a servant, so that we might be made equal in the eyes of the Father, washed white as snow. Give my precious daughter my love.

Faithfully His,


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