Saturday, July 18, 2009

OB update, visit back to RNICU, Fire at our house, 30th birthday on Sunday....too much excitement

First I want to start off with, we are fine, all of us are doing great, Matt, Me, Tobi, and Luke. We are fine.

Thursday I had my scheduled OB visit with Joey and he said that based on the blood glucose levels he got from me testing for the past week, there was no reason for me to keep checking. He wasn't sure how I failed the GTT and said that it was so marginal, it was not an issue. He would check it randomly as I came in for my appointments. We are measuring 28.4-which I was told it was rare for petite women to measure exact, and I am. Joey said that next week we are gonna do the 4-D ultrasound. I'm very excited, as we've never had one before. I asked him what our "goal" was and said, "39?" and he said, "how bout we do mini goals? 30, 32, 34...etc". He knows me well enough to know I like a plan. So after my appointment, I went to visit my dear friend Rachel, I've talked about, that lost her son Isaac, the December before Layah came, on his birthday after only 18 minutes, from Trisomy 16, a chromosomal defect that was detected and terminally diagnosed at 16 weeks. She had a precious daughter, Annabella on the 3rd of July. To make a long story short she had an infection from her c-section and was admitted to be treated with IV antibiotics. (This happened to me after Tobi, but mine was an abscess from some blood left behind after the section). I took her the breast pump I'd used with Tobi, as I have a newer one I got with Layah. We had a great visit, and after about an hour and half, I told her I was gonna try to go down to the RNICU (nursery where Tobi and Layah were). I knew if I started down there, and with my superhero smell right now, if it was too much, I'd get on the elevator and just leave. But I prayed I would be okay. I really wanted to do it. As I passed the all too familiar family waiting room, I saw, at a distance, a nurse keying in her code to get in the RNICU, and asked her if she could hold the door. As I got closer to her, she and I both recognized one another. It was one of the nurses that kept Layah at night. We talked as we walked to the side where she was working-which was the exact spot Layah's short life was spent. Another nurse that didn't keep Layah, but was there when she was there, and recognized me, also was glad to see me-big and pregnant. As we chatted, Jill walked up. She was Tobi's first nurse, that I adored and she helped me learn how to take his temp and change his tiny diaper on his 2 lb body. Jill's mother had been really ill and when she had op surgery several years ago, her pre op nurse was Matt's mom. Jill didn't get to keep Layah, but she was there when we were. I didn't cry, as we talked, and I was pleasantly surprised. Than I asked Jill if Dr. Randolph was around, (he was the precious doctor that was there when Layah passed, and pronounced her). She said he was not working that day. I wanted him to know that , although he never knew, I ordered Layah's medical records. I knew why and how she died, but for me is was another piece of my journey through grief. I needed to have a tangible piece of the medical information. At the very end of his medical dictation, he had written, "may she rest in peace". I wept as I read it and got choked up telling Jill about it. It just showed me that not only does this team of doctors and nurses in the RNICU work so hard to keep these babies alive with medical technology, they are also so compassionate and kind and recognize these tiny babies are precious lives. It was very meaningful to me that he wrote that, when he had no idea, I would read that. So, Jill told me that she didn't want to see me in the RNICU, but as soon as Luke came, to let them know so they could come and visit us in the WELL BABY NURSERY. I left very at peace. The smells, the beeps, and all the commotion and activity was the same, but I was not. The Lord walked with me in and out of there. I was very glad I went.

Friday night was a whole other "adventure". Matt had gone over to a friend's house. He got home about 10:30. I was still awake. He told me he was really tired. He went to the living room, and ended up falling asleep on the couch watching a DVD. I went in there about midnight and told him I was turning everything off and to come to bed. I walked back to our room and got in bed. He went to the guest bathroom and then he didn't come to bed. I got up when I saw the light still on down the hall; he was in the kitchen. Most nights, Matt will eat something really late. I got in the bed, and I guess maybe 30 minutes later I smelled something burning. I started walking down the hall and there was smoke all in the kitchen, dining and living room. Matt was over at the stove at this point. I was trying to get the back door open to get some of the smoke out. When he took the lid off the skillet (he'd left cooking on low & he fell back asleep), the food (fried shrimp, in a little olive oil)caught fire. As he was trying to get to the back door, some of it flew onto the floor, still on fire. I grabbed a beach towel, we keep at the back door for cleaning Gracey's feet off when she comes in, and began trying to get the fire out on the floor-our newly installed laminent that Matt and his dad put in in April. The smoke detectors had not gone off. I went and got Tobi, (the smoke had not yet made it that far down the hall) and went to put him in the van. Gracey did not bark or anything, which kinda surprised me, since she's such a loyal dog. She just flew out the back once we got the back door open. I went back in and got my purse from our bedroom, and Matt had opened all the doors by now. I was upset and bawling crying because it hit me that we could have died- and the weekend of my 30th birthday. I called my mom and asked her to bring some fans over. It was 1am. She lives in Helena and has trouble sleeping many nights, so she happened to have been awake when I called, so she came right over. I called 911 because I was afraid the smoke was still poisonous and didn't want to go back in till I knew it was safe. I told them there was no fire, and it was just a lot of smoke. They came, (thank God with only the lights flashing and no sirens) along with an ambulance. I got some oxygen since I was coughing my wasn't stating 100% on the pulsoxiemter, and my pulse was racing. It was wiered how a few minutes of 100% oxygen can make you feel so much better. Matt ended up getting a good bit of oxygen too because he'd gone in and out after I stopped going in. The firemen opened the windows and took in a heavy-duty fan to suck some of the smoke out. They checked the smoke detectors, (which are wired into the house's power, and backed up by a battery), but all were working. There just wasn't one close enough to the kitchen and dining room, as there should be. We spent the rest of the night at my mom's. I couldn't sleep well. Matt, of course, felt horrible, but it was an accident and he will never again cook anything in the middle of the night; he'll eat a sandwich or cereal or something. So that was that. We were safe. The good Lord woke me and Matt and we were able to keep any serious damage from happening to us or the house. Oh, and the floors were perfect, no damage, so if you're thinking about putting hardwood or laminent, laminent is the way to go; it doesnt burn quickly. Now we are just battling getting the house deodorized from this horrible smoke smell. It'll dissipate, but not quick enough for me and my k9 smell along with migraines.

Today, Mom and I got some stuff to start deodorizing the house, and then repotted my peace lillies that I got at Layah's funeral. My dear mother in law made my favorite meal she cooks-salsbury steak, mashed potatoes, steamed broccali, and she bought me a mini cake from Publix. It was a nice ending to an eventful day! We were all pooped from being up so early. I read the devotional for Friday and this was the verse:

"Psalm 18:1-6 ....I love you, O LORD, my strength. The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I call to the LORD, who is worthy of praise, and I am saved from my enemies. The cords of death entangled me; the torrents of destruction overwhelmed me. The cords of the grave coiled around me; the snares of death confronted me. In my distress I called to the LORD; I cried to my God for help.From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears."

The devotional talked about that sometimes after a trauma we brace ourselves for what might be coming next. If we’ve had a phone call that brought bad news, every time the phone rings we feel panicky and wonder, What has happened now?
The psalmist David felt this way, as King Saul was trying to kill him, and David just knew he was going to die soon. He called out to the Lord, as the Lord calmed him and was his refuge and protector. I was reminded that, all though many of us who have a relationship with the Lord, still will feel, at times, like "what the heck?! what bad is gonna happen next? why cant I get a break?" but He "hears our voice and our cry comes before Him, INTO HIS EARS!" He was with us Saturday morning, just as He has been all along, through all the storms we've faced. I think Satan wants us to question God's prescence in our life and if He really wants us to be happy. We know, because of His word, He is with us all the time, and He has a plan for us and wants us to be happy-no matter what the circumstance.

Sunday night, we will celebrate my 30th birthday at the Cheesecake Factory-which I just couldn't go to last year after Layah passed in June, but we typically do every year for my birthday. I praise God for 30 years of life on this earth, but most importantly, that my path is directed towards Him, every day, week, month, year, from now until I see His face.

Faithfully His,


1 comment:

  1. Happy Birthday! From TJ and Christine